domingo, 1 de novembro de 2009
Pretend is another way to be.
He made me see my weakness and don’t fear or be ashamed of it. He show me that is good to have someone to trust, to talk and just don’t care about what he think about us. Someone to tell our deepest secrets, our beliefs and to be cater to.
For one night I could be myself. Even showing just a part of me. The good one, the week one, the woman. And I did it so calm, so gently that I couldn’t recognize myself. I had no idea I could be so true, so human.
I don’t know what happened. Maybe I was feeling different. Maybe he had changed me. Maybe I’m changing. Or not. Maybe I was affected by beer. Or not. I have such no idea of what happened in that night. All I know is that I want so badly to repeat it. It feels good. Even when I’m constantly thinking about disappear or just listen to him.
And in the middle of all that I get lost. He says that wants to change me, but even tough I want to let him to, I can’t. there’s a lot of things between us. There’s a lot of people between us.
So now I don’t know what to do. I don’t know if it worth the sacrifice of changing a life and getting into another person’s life or let he come into mine. The point is that he’s already inside of me. And there’s a tinny line called ego under my feeling. A blind line I can´t cross over. At least not alone. A line which makes me think if it’s all real or not. A line that goes against every single thing I’ve been seeding and feeding for too many time just to leave it, between heaven and hell, between happiness and all.
Please Morpheus, let me go. Wake me up.
